The Queen left the ghostly Lootus 2 with her nets still down in the water. I'll never forget sitting alongside that trawler in the fog and looking up at the rusty hull and the large round dangling lights, which hung across the deck. We couldn't see anyone on board at all. It seemed as if the ship was running all by itself with nobody to haul the nets in. As soon as we pushed off towards Halifax on the Esperanza we noticed that the Lootus 2 finally stopped for hauling after 18 hours of having those nets down in the deep. It's upsetting to think about that ship still out there tearing up the sea floor along with so many others. We didn't stop deep sea destruction in international waters because we need the UN to do that but we went out there to tell a story and I think we told it very well. The bottom trawlers out there in the NAFO area might be hidden in fog but we've unveiled their actions to the world. It's up to governments now to make the right decision by putting in place a moratorium on high seas bottom trawling and granting deep sea biodiversity the reprieve it deserves. You can help by sending them an e.mail.
It's been a great success! I'd like to think that the pipe carrier who came on the ship and blessed it before we left actually had some effect. I'm not usually one for reading much into "signs" but there are two things, which struck me as pretty amazing and they happened at the start and right at the end of the campaign. Just before we left Halifax to go to the Grand Banks there was a rainbow over the Esperanza and I only happened to see it through a window in a shop on the waterfront. Then on the way back to Halifax I was awake in the early hours of the morning and decided to pay a visit to Satu and Thjise who were doing watch on the bridge. We stood outside and witnessed a meteor shower with shooting stars appearing almost every minute. That was my last time looking out at the open ocean on the ship and it was just beautiful. There was no moon in the sky but it was lit up with stars, many of which are not visible to the naked eye from most places on land because of the light pollution. These two events, together with the sheer luck of finding the Lootus 2, have made me question my usual atheist tendencies.
Being back in Halifax it was hectic since we did an open ship for 2 days and had lots of people on board. I enjoyed talking to people about the bridge for a few hours and whenever there were kids in the tour group I would get them to help me switch the bridge window wipers and water on and we'd wash the windows. When the kids didn't want to accept my offer I was surprised when adults were keen to take their place! I felt so lucky to have spent time living and working on the ship, which so many people were now queuing up in the hot sun to spend a few moments on.
I didn't get much sleep during my last night on the ship because so many new people had just arrived and others were leaving early in the morning so I wanted to stay up and make the most of the time I had left with everyone. I helped Chris, the radio operator, do his laundry and then said goodbye to him and Virginia who left at 4:30am. Then I went down to the mess and ate toast with Flo before getting around 2 hours sleep. Woke up at 7:30, hugged more people goodbye as they left one by one, swept and mopped the campaign office, packed up my things and sat down for lunch but I couldn't eat much at all. My heart felt like it had expanded several times it's usual size and it was difficult to breathe let alone eat. Strange how emotions can really manifest themselves physically.
I walked down the gangway one last time and turned around to wave at the Esperanza with tears welling up in my eyes. It was tough to accept that such a good thing had come to an end. I can only hope that I'll experience it all again sometime in the not too distant future.
So that's it folks. The Esperanza is now making it's way back across the Atlantic, heading for Norway. Most of the crew from the Deep Sea campaign have gone their seperate ways and I'm sitting on my bed back home now, looking at the crew photo and it doesn't feel like I have totally left at all. I took a taxi to the airport with Maite and Flo and we sat down for coffee before we each flew off in different directions. Maite told a story about a conversation she had with someone once when they said "your body travels faster than your mind and so when you leave a place you have been for a long time part of you stays there for a while". I certainly feel that way now.
